There is nothing inherently wrong with having comfort zones. They're so often made out to be bad and wrong.

I used to believe that too. I used to believe that to be "conscious" one had constantly to leap beyond the comfort zone into the unknown. I even bought that if you didn't do that you were just one of the destroyers of the planet and a kind of programmed robot with no choice or awareness.

So to combat that I used to try and force myself to leap way beyond my comfort zone and, for me, that was never fun or a pleasant experience. When I forced things, they didn't turn out well, and I ended up feeling stupid, useless, and a failure.

What I've realised for me as I got older is that I don't have to push so hard, and certainly don't have to force myself. If I have to force it, it's mostly likely going to end unpleasantly.

So now... I'm making peace with my comfort zones and gently stretching them day-by-day.

I don't have to try and jump 100% out of the comfort zone... I can stretch it 1-5% each day in ways that work for me and that are actually exciting and thrilling rather than poo-your-pants scary!

I gave myself permission to be OK with my comfort zones and be easy with myself when I'm not quite ready to stretch them.

I acknowledged that I'm not evil, bad, or wrong for enjoying my comfort zones.

I also recognise that we are all different. Some people really love to expand their comfort zones dynamically. It's fun for them. That's totally cool.

It's a bit like a spectrum really... we each need to find our comfort zone with stretching our comfort zone! And for each one of us, it will be different.

Comparing ourselves and our comfort-zone-stretching with others is not helpful to them or us. We end up making someone better or worse than the other, which just isn't the case. We are all just different.

• Where are you with your comfort zones?

• Are you OK with them or do you judge yourself for them?

• Do you try to force yourself to go way beyond them or do you stretch them gently in ways that work for you?

• Are there comfort zones that you know could do with a little stretching?

• Could you be a little less forceful and be more gentle with yourself with some comfort zones?

It's OK to have comfort zones, and it's OK to stretch them too. If you haven't already, give yourself permission to play with your comfort zones in ways that work for you and that are kind to you.