But I don’t want to be a millionaire!

There is such a prevalent belief in the world that everyone should want to be a millionaire. That it’s something we should all be striving for. That having it will make all our problems vanish and disappear. And… that may be true. And more likely it will not.

If it’s something you have been telling yourself you want, and something you have been trying to achieve let me ask you a question: when was the last time you stopped to ask yourself, do I truly want this? What have I decided being a millionaire will give me that I don’t have already or that I cannot have by other ways?

Heads up people: being a millionaire won’t suddenly make your problems disappear. It won’t “fix” your relationships. It won’t change how you relate to your body. It won’t make global warming disappear. It won’t stop you worrying about losing everything - indeed, I’ve spoken to a few millionaires in my life who have said that having more money makes them worry about losing it and ending up with nothing! Of course, that’s not guaranteed. I’ve also spoken to millionaires who are completely comfortable with what they have and don’t have that fear.

Adverts are in abundance with “get rich quick” schemes. And products and systems that will “make you 6 figures in a matter of weeks”. They are written to pull you in and get you to think a) it’s something that you should want b) you can get it overnight c) you’re stupid or mad if you don’t buy into it. They’re slick, enticing, and totally designed to get you to part with your well-earned money, making your bank account balance go down and theirs go up. Ironic right?

Growing up I was happy and content creating money when I wanted it. When my parents refused to give me money for things I wanted, I always managed to find some babysitting jobs that gave me more than enough money for what I wanted and some money to play with as well.

What I have found over the last 10 years or so was that I was buying more and more into the belief that to be able to change the world I should be a millionaire - that it was the most effective way. Notice there’s no question in any of that? Is that really true? Can we only change the world by being a millionaire?

Truth is, we change the world with every choice we make. When we choose to hold the door open for the person who’s struggling with the pushchair (stroller for all you americans 😉 ). When we smile at someone in the street and they light up and smile back. When we slow down in the road to allow someone to pull out from the side road. When we choose not totally lose our temper with someone who doesn’t quite understand what we are saying and instead choose patience. When we stop ourselves immediately we notice we judging ourselves, or anyone else. All of these seemingly small things, ripple out and change the world in ways we can barely imagine.

What is key for me is making peace with how much I already have in the bank and being OK with it. Letting myself know it’s OK not to want to be a millionaire. Personally, I’d love to have around £20k in the bank at all times. More would be great, but I’d be very happy with a minimum of £20k. Flowing in and out, with a constant balance. For each of us, that number will be different. 5 years ago I’d have been happy with about £1000. My balance at that time was very often £0! The number may change over the years, and, if it doesn’t, that’s OK too.

I used to get so stressed about trying to be a millionaire and look for all the blocks and beliefs that told me it wasn’t possible for me and try to obliterate them. It was almost an obsession. I used to tell myself all sorts of unkind lies, like “if I were truly choosing to be conscious I’d create being a millionaire”. Seriously?! WTF was I thinking?!

At the same time of having that crazy going on in my head I was not acknowledging that being a millionaire is not something I aspire to be right now. That may change. And it may not. And you know what? That’s OK.

So… get clear about what you truly would like to have in your bank and aim for that. Let go of all those pressures and points of view that tell you that you should want more. It’s OK not to.